Insecurity: self-love is/isn’t the answer

24-03-2023

Love your neighbor as yourself.

It's the commandment that is greatest over all the others, apart from loving God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30-31).
And it's key in dealing with insecurity.


Loving yourself if you don't like yourself

The commandment is so familiar, yet so hard to follow if you deal with insecurities.

Are you really loving yourself when those insecurities are still there?

The doubt about your path in life;

The discontentment about your looks;

The feeling that you will never measure up;

The idea that you are not good enough;

The belief that you're not loved by God—or by others…

Let's stop there. Those thoughts are not going to release you from the bondage of insecurity. They need to be replaced by thoughts of self-love.


What does self-love mean?

Self-love is an immensely popular word in today's society. It will be hard to find a coach or mentor who's not mentioning the term.

But self-love doesn't mean loving yourself to pieces for the things you accomplish or say or do. Self-love doesn't have to be focused on the self.

The self-love that is needed to free you from insecurities is the understanding that you can love yourself because you are God's creation. And what God creates is good.
That's why you ought to love yourself.

What other creations of God do you love?
Your partner?
Nature?
Animals?

Include yourself on the list as well.


Only one part of the answer

Learning to love yourself is essential in dealing with insecurity. It's not the answer to breaking free from it forever, but it's part of the answer.

So yes, biblical self-love, as commanded by our God, is an answer to the question of whether or not it helps with becoming more confident.

The other parts of the answer have to do with building a relationship with Jesus, reading His word, praying, captivating wrong and negative thoughts and bringing those to light.

Once you become more confident, it isn't the end station.
Being a confident person is a continual process of fighting thoughts. We're fighting an enemy that uses your mind to draw you away from your identity. The battles fought in your mind can't be seen but can cause so much harm.

Fortunately, we have a mighty God who has the power to set us free.
—Who is on our side, and who's gonna win the battle with us every single time!

"What then shall we say in response to these things, if God is for us, who can be against us?" —Romans 8:31